Change is Constant. but Change without Growth is Dissoulution and Death. -Kody J. Bosch I have found in my life a distinct cycle - I don't have a community, then I do have a community - which helps me to grow and learn and experience and ultimately comes a point where I have to decide to slowly decompose, or react against that community and its members. Almost instinctively, or unconsciously, I eject formerly treasured people out of my life, or they do the same to me.
Whether by outright malice, altercations, blowups, or even worse slowly ghosting, indifference - fading into the background as they become less and less capable of relating to you, or lose interest in even trying - I have found that people have an interest in you staying the same. in Not Growing. If you are a growing, doing - evolving person. as I believe we are meant to be - you hit a glass ceiling at the limits of the altitude of your group of People. So you go through life not really having people. Lonely times punctuated by occasional community until you outgrow that group and it starts over again. I don't imagine that these types of individuals will ever find their community, or people - on earth. A small handful you will journey with your entire life, and even if you outgrow them, or they outgrow you - both parties are confident enough in each other that this is not a threat. I suppose those are your people - trouble is you are often scattered about the earth ! - if you bridge all the miles and knock on their door, surely all will be well! Also, as a type A person - you initiate everything. and everyone gets used to you initiatiing everything. so what need is there to reach out ? The strong person, the person who is contributing the most Value to the world, its people - plants, and animals. are probably the lonlinest people you can find - until they discover a way to transpose their lonliness into a Joy of Solitude. I think that that comes more from converting into a human "Being" rather than a human "Doing." Get used to the discomfort! you either are miserable by betraying yourself into an arbitrarily small life being sucked into the morass of your Old Friends as they become normies, or slowly fall apart over many decades -or- you fly solo and intersect another flock - eventually they too will part. you have to learn to be okay with that. It will take you a few decades. But ultimately the highs are much higher, and the contentment is much more when you make the leap and build the airplane before you hit the ground - Everyone else is slowly decaying, and if they realize it - they are in denial - and it only exacerbates and accelerates their decline. Trees never stop growing! and we are walking trees! Nothing in nature ceases to expand, evolve, regenerate, metamorphosis, etc etc - it all has season and everything expands and creates greater and greater fruits - why are so many human beings afraid of change? Afraid of the growing pains? Afraid of alienating themselves in order to have a greater quality of life ? So I call it a Growth Gap - when you outpace your previous community, go through a dark knight, until suddenly the stretched rubber band launches you into the next Great Thing ~~~ Carry On Soldier! Keep on Keeping on ! |
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November 2022
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